The Cars I've Owned II

THE MARRIED-BUT-NO-KIDS YEAR

1986 Chevy Monte Carlo
This was a sweet car! The manufacture color was deep metallic red but it was more like a very dark purple. I am not a fan of purple cars but this one was sharp! We bought it and the one below new in '86. It seemed like a good idea at the time. We were young, had great jobs, no kids...
Did you notice the title above? The Married-But-No-Kids years actually only lasted for one year. And as a result we added a healthy new baby, with all of his joys, to our two healthy new car payments. That wasn't smart...but the cars were nice.



1986 Pontiac Sunbird
This was my wife's car. We added 14 inch tires with Kelsey Hayes wheels. It was black with red pinstripes and red interior. It was sharp! I wish I had the actual picture because the picture below doesn't do it justice.



1973 Volkswagen Beetle Convertible
This one was for fun. We bought it for $1,500, drove it for a year and a half and then sold it for $1,800. It would be worth much more than that now. This car was in great shape! No rust, no motor smoke, new top, and the heater worked! Every once in a while the battery would not turn the car over and we would have to push it to get it started. But I don't know anyone who has owned an older Bug that didn't need to push it to get it started from time to time.

The Cars I've Owned

These are not the actual pictures of the cars that I owned but are very similar. I smile as I look at how the cars represent seasons in my life.

THE EARLY YEARS

1970 Camaro
350 small block with 375 horse heads, 12.5 to 1 compression pistons, over sized racing cam, Edelbrock high rise intake with Holley 850 double pumper carb, headers and dual exhaust, automatic turbo transmission, stock rear end. My son says, "This must have been the cool season of your life."
This car would scream! (read: It was scary fast and it's a wonder I'm still alive!)



1964 Volkswagen Beetle Bug
Why did I go from the hot rod above to this one? I swear my dad didn't tell me that I had to check the oil every time I put gas in the Camaro. And...I blew it up. When the mechanic checked it, he just had to tell my dad that it was bone dry on oil. My dad took the motor out, put a 6 cylinder in it (sniff) and then sold it. He then bought me this car. By the way, it wasn't all bad. This Bug had a 50 horsepower motor and I could squeal the tires when I popped the clutch. And I got a ticket once to prove it.



1980 Chevrolet Citation
Junk! The first car I purchased with my own money. I thought it was cool that it had a vertical cassette radio but other than that, not so much. This car finds itself on the list of the worst cars. It was an embarrassment to Chevrolet and to me.



1983 Pontiac Trans Am
Dignity restored. T-tops and fast. Two speeding tickets to prove it. I finally had to sell it when I got married. The sacrifices we make for the women we love.

Specter in 2001

A friend sent this to me today. It just makes me shake my head.

After Senator Jeffords left the Republican Party in 2001, Senator Specter spoke in the Senate and proposed a rule change to prevent senators for switching parties.

Arlen Specter

Well, well, well. Arlen Specter made it official. He switched from the G.O.P. to the Democratic party. Are any of us who know him really surprised? He has been a Democrat in Republican clothes for a long time. Don't believe a word he said in his news conference about why he is switching parties. This is not a principled move because the Republican party has moved further and further to the right. It's about poll numbers and a paycheck! I don't know about you, but I am so tired of elected government representatives who care more about getting re-elected than what's important! That is what this switch is all about, plain and simple.

Specter blamed conservatives for delivering control of the Senate to the Democrats in 2006. The real reason the Republicans lost ground in both U. S. houses is because of their lack of conservatism not because they were too conservative. (i.e. Rick Santorum losing his Senate re-election bid in 2006 due largely to the fact that he supported and endorsed liberal senator Arlen Specter. Hmmm.)

Come on, Pennsylvania! Wake up! Pat Toomey for Senate!

Here's a quote from Pat Toomey's website - www.toomeyforsenate.com:
“Senator Specter’s decision is in keeping with his record. He is more at home in the Democratic Party than the Republican Party. That has been true for decades, not just true today.

In recent weeks, Senator Specter has made numerous statements about how important it is to deny Democrats the 60th seat in the U.S. Senate and how he categorically intended to remain a Republican to prevent one-party dominance in Washington.

What Pennsylvanians must now ask themselves is whether Senator Specter is in fact devoted to any principle other than his own reelection.”

Commercials

Since switching from satellite to cable with a DVR (digital video recorder), I don't much watch commercials anymore. It's actually quite nice to watch an hour television show in 40 or so minutes. And watch it when I want to watch it. But from time to time I do catch a commercial or two that makes smile. Here are a couple.

Captain Richard Phillips Returns

Everyone is thrilled to have Captain Richard Phillips home and by all reports he is a great man! All in this video are joyful because their husband, son, and father has safely returned home. But as a father with a teenage daughter, I couldn't help but notice how Captain Phillips' daughter would not let go of her daddy. This is a great video.

I couldn't get it to post here in the right size, so below is the link to it on Youtube. You can also see it by clicking on the title above.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0j4SS3ENu4

Making Amends

A few days ago, I posted a blog about my wife’s antics on April Fool’s Day. My wife read it and asked me, in a very sweet way I might add, why I only told the world about the twisted, mean things she has done to me on April 1st. She said, “There are a lot funny things that I have done that aren’t so mean. Why didn’t you speak of those?” Well...do I really need to tell you what this posting is about? Really?

There was one April 1st that my wife decided to make it appear that our house had been robbed. She took all of our valuables, including electronics and hid them in an out building. When I walked into the house, I noticed right away that our very large television was gone. Upon further inspection, I also discovered that our VCR, computer, microwave, my wife’s jewelry, my golf clubs and several other things were missing. All of it gone!

My three adolescent children were with me as I walked into the house and they thought it was funny. I know this because they were dancing through the house singing, “We were robbed! We were robbed!” Everything at that age is a game. I remember once while I was out of town that my wife’s car broke down on a very busy highway and a police officer allowed her and the kids to sit in the his car while she waited for help to come. They looked at her and with a sheepish grin on their faces began to sing from the back seat, “Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do?” (For those who don’t know, that’s from the theme song of the T.V. show Cops.)

Okay, back to the crime scene. As my kids are dancing through the house, I was yelling at them, “Get out of the house! Don’t touch anything! There may be fingerprints on stuff!” They eventually danced out to the porch and waited as I started to call the authorities. Something inside of me told me that I should call my wife first and let her know what was going on in case she came home and saw the police and the CSI team outside our home. I didn't want her to come home and freak out! I remembered that she had a hair appointment that day so I called the salon. When her hairdresser answered the phone, she chuckled when I told her who it was. She was in on it or at least knew about it! That’s when I figured it out. Good thing I called her before the police!

There are other jokes that I will post later. I need to spread this penance out for as long as I can.

"Officer Down!"

It's a call over a police radio that no one, especially those who wear the uniform, wants to hear. This morning, Pittsburgh police officers were ambushed and gunned down as they were responding to a domestic disturbance call in the Stanton Heights neighborhood. As a result, three police officers lost their lives and two others were injured. The Pittsburgh community and our entire nation mourns these fallen officers and prays for their families, friends, and colleagues.

http://www.odmp.org/

South Park - How Banks Work Today

Got my retirement account statement the other day and it's gone! Poof! Not really, but almost. I am glad that I am only 45 and invested for the long term!

Well, it’s a little after 11 p.m. and I only have a little less than an hour to worry. What am I worried about? My wife. Let me explain. Today is April 1st or April Fools Day and for many years, my lovely wife thinks that this is the day that she must play a practical joke on me. Now when I say practical joke , I don’t mean a simple, fun, Ha Ha, kind of joke. I am talking about make-me-feel-like-I’ve-been-punched-in-the-gut kind of joke.

Let me tell you what she has done to me.

One April Fool’s Day my wife came up with this elaborate plan that involved my then 9-year-old son. It was early evening and I had fallen asleep watching television. While I was oblivious to the conscious world, she took the skin from the chicken breast she was preparing and laid it on my son’s arm. She then took ketchup and syrup that she mixed to a perfect blood-like mixture. As my son watched with a grin on his face, she poured the “blood” all over his arm. Then she ran with him to the living room and screamed for me to help her because “Ean had cut his arm with a knife!” I jumped up, and in my daze, grabbed him and ran to the bathroom to see if there was something I could do!

My stomach was sick as I looked at his skin laid open with blood all over it! I think I saw his bone! It was awful! Then with a slight grin on her face, she looked at me and said those infamous words, “April Fools!” I was so angry! It must have shown on my face because as soon as my son looked up at me, he began to yell in frantic repetition, “Mommy made me do it, Daddy! Mommy made me do it!” A little while later, our son went to his mother and told her that he didn’t want to be a part of her pranks on me anymore! I tell you, she is evil!

Another time, she again used some food and fake blood to prank me. Our laundry room was in the basement so she would regularly take clothes down the steps while carrying them in a laundry basket. I was upstairs doing something when I heard her fall and yell like she was hurt. I ran to the basement and found her lying on the floor with her face buried in the clothes, basket nearby. She moaned that she hurt her leg and as I look down at her ankle, I saw what appeared to be her tibia poking through her sock and blood was all over it. It was in fact a beef bone she placed very carefully in her sock.

I again became sick at my stomach as I tried to figure out what to do. I asked in a panicked state if she wanted me to carry her up the stairs or if she wanted me to leave her there and go call 911 and have the EMTs come down to get her. She continued to have her face buried in the clothes and I thought she was crying. Later I discovered she was laughing as she looked up and said it again! “April Fools!” When will I ever learn? This woman is evil!

But I do love her! She tells me all the time that my life would be boring without her. She is right. The funny thing is that all my friends try to warn me. One sent me a text this morning and told me to beware! They actually think it is funny because I am so easy to mess with.

Well, I still have a little more time to “beware” and I am hoping she does not have the energy to do something this year. But I think I remember that there was one year when she waited until April 2nd to prank me. Oh, no, I forgot about that one. I don’t think I will be able to sleep well tonight.